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A Very Sexy Beginner's Guide to BDSM Words | GQ

BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage , discipline , dominance and submission , sadomasochism , and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves to be practising BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture often is said to depend on self-identification and shared experience. BDSM is now used as a catch-all phrase covering a wide range of activities, forms of interpersonal relationships , and distinct subcultures. BDSM communities generally welcome anyone with a non-normative streak who identifies with the community; this may include cross-dressers , body modification enthusiasts, animal roleplayers , rubber fetishists , and others. Activities and relationships in BDSM are often characterized by the participants' taking on roles that are complementary and involve inequality of power; thus, the idea of informed consent of both the partners is essential. The terms submissive and dominant are often used to distinguish these roles: the dominant partner "dom" takes psychological control over the submissive "sub". The terms top and bottom are also used; the top is the instigator of an action while the bottom is the receiver of the action.
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A Very Sexy Beginner's Guide to BDSM Words

One person may naturally make most of the decisions or take the lead while the other prefers to simply go along for the ride. Switching roles in the bedroom from time to time can be an effective way to spice things up in a relationship when your sex life could use a boost. It can be fun and empowering to tap into a different side of your sexual self.
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It is part of the BDSM group of paraphilias. Physical contact is not a necessity, and can even be conducted anonymously over telephone, email or more recently instant messaging services. In other cases it can be intensely physical, sometimes traversing into sadomasochism. Those who take the superior position are called Dominants , Doms male or Dommes female , while those who take the subordinate position are called subs or submissives.
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